April 27, 2024

‘SNL’ returns with ‘Rudy Giuliani’ and his witnesses compete in the election

The opening drawing of the NBC variety show was Giuliani McKinnon at a hearing in Michigan, where witnesses gave testimony about allegations of voter fraud.

“This election was stolen from the American people with a level of deception not seen since Houdini,” said McKinnon’s Giuliani as he farted. “That wasn’t me. You guys were.”

McKinnon’s Giuliani said he and President Trump would flip the scores first in Michigan, then in “Georgiavania” and “North-a-Canada.”

Well, today I have brought before you dozens of very smart, hardly drunk people, all of them eyewitnesses, ”said Giuliani MacKinnon.

The first witness was Cecily Strong playing Melissa Caron, an IT contractor for Dominion Voting Systems, who spoke with Giuliani at a hearing in Michigan and Audible laughing face.

Strong Caroni said, “I swear to tell my full story, and nothing but my story will help me God.”

Then Strong’s Karon told the committee at the hearing to lose their position “just as” she lost “all of Trump’s ballot papers” and said she personally saw hundreds, if not thousands, of the dead vote.

“Have you checked every survey? Have you spoken to all of the dead?” Strong Karon asked senators about Michigan. “I’m not lying. I fell after David.”

Other witnesses included the woman “ate the ballot papers,” the man who was kidnapped by the aliens, Michael J Lindell – my pillow chief executive, and Chloe Feynman, who was playing the character Nicole Kidman in The Undoing on HBO.

Then Strong returns as Caron to say that Dominion tricked her into making her cheese bread.

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One of the senators told her, “I think you confuse a Dominion with a Dominus.”

“Either way, it took me more than 30 minutes to vote, so it’s supposed to be free,” said Strong Caroni.

Finally, McKinnon’s Giuliani said he wouldn’t give up the fight to cancel the election.

“In conclusion, I say the defense remains, but we will never calm down. Not until these elections are canceled, or I get a full amnesty and $ 10 million in cash,” Giuliani said in McKinnon. “And if you liked what I saw here today, we are holding a press conference right after that at the Ritz-Carlton … the plumbing and heating company.”

Then MacKinnon said the show’s signature sign: “Live … from New York! It’s Saturday Night!”